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Double Duty: The Financial and Emotional Strain of Caring for Two Generations

Taking care of family members - granny and her daughter and  grandson and granddaughter
From mounting caregiving expenses to emotional burnout, the Sandwich Generation is under pressure. But with the right tools and support, caregivers can regain control and protect their own well-being.

Years ago, if you were to call a group the Sandwich Generation, one may start humming the old Oscar Mayer, My Bologna Has A First Name, tune. Yet today, this term describes many middle-aged Americans between 35 and 60, who are sandwiched between raising their children and caring for their aging parents or grandparents.

A recent Carewell survey indicated that 71% of middle-aged Americans make up this Sandwich Generation and 70% of them also work full-time jobs. Their caregiving tasks take up an average of 37 hours per week on top of their full or part-time occupations. Forty-one percent of those surveyed are the sole caregivers and 63% live paycheck to paycheck.

Serving these dual roles comes with its share of challenges. According to recent AARP research, the Sandwich Generation spends an average of $5,538 on housing-related expenses and $1,537 on medical caregiving expenses monthly. These expenses are higher than the general caregiver expenses of those outside this generation, whose average monthly expenses are $3791 and $1225, respectively.

Adding to financial challenges, the Sandwich Generation said they often struggle with emotional stress, lack of personal time, physical demands, the pressure of caring for both generations effectively, and the time conflicts from balancing work and caregiving.

One might ask; What is the answer? What do you tell a Sandwich Generationer, who is in the high number of those experiencing burnout due to these stress factors? You may find these answers helpful.

1.     Develop a Financial Plan

The AARP continues to work to help ease the financial burdens caregivers face. We are advocating for The Credit for Caring Act which will provide financial support for individual caregivers through a $5,000 federal tax credit for eligible working family caregivers that would cover 30% of qualified expenses they incurred above $2,000.

2.     Prioritize Self-Care
Caring for yourself is not a luxury, it’s a necessity.

  • Take Regular Breaks
    Schedule time for activities that help you relax and recharge, such as reading, meditating, or listening to music
  • Seek Mental Health Support
    Talking with a therapist or counselor can be a powerful outlet. Use tools like
    The Psychology Today Therapist Directory to find someone locally or online.
  • Stay Physically Active
    Incorporate regular movement into your week. Even short walks can reduce stress, elevate mood, and improve your overall well-being

3.      Seek and Accept Help
Many caregivers (63%) say that seeking and accepting help is essential. Here are effective ways to do so:

  • Join Support Groups
    Connect with others by participating in caregiver support groups, either in person or online. Websites like AARP Caregiving offer resources and community support.
  • Reach Out to Family and Friends
    Ask family and friends for help with errands, meals, or emotional support. Involving others lightens your load and builds a stronger support network.
  • Consider Professional Care Services
    Explore adult daycare programs or respite care for short-term relief. These services provide vital breaks and help prevent caregiver burnout.

4.    Stay Organized
Organization can ease the stress of juggling multiple responsibilities. Try these practical tips:

  • Use a Planner or Calendar App
    Schedule appointments and daily tasks using a physical planner or digital tools like Google Calendar to stay on track.
  • Create Task Checklists
    Break big tasks into smaller steps. Use a notebook or mobile app to manage your to-do list and celebrate progress.
  • Maintain a Caregiving File
    Keep all essential information—medical records, emergency contacts, and care instructions—in one place, whether digitally or in a physical binder.

5.    Practice Patience and Empathy
The emotional side of caregiving can be challenging. Cultivating patience and empathy helps foster understanding and compassion:

  • Use Mindfulness Techniques
    Practice meditation or breathing exercises to stay grounded. Free resources like the UCLA Mindful app offer guided sessions.
  • Educate Yourself
    Learn more about the health conditions and needs of your loved ones. Sites like the AARP Resources for Caregivers and their Families and Family Caregiver Alliance provide helpful insights.
  • Foster Open Communication
    Hold regular family discussions to express needs, share responsibilities, and resolve concerns together.

The overall goal must be to maintain your well-being and self-care so that you will be healthy enough to care for others.

 

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